The Unlikely Date
by Tailsisreal
Summary: Entry for Pikana's Unique Pairing Contest. Samus Aran is one of the most sought after females in the Brawl community, but which lucky male will be the one she chooses to give her heart? Also includes a second surprise couple as well. oneshot


Hello, all! I'm branching out a bit now into the Smash Bros catagory with this fanfic. It's actually for a contest a friend of mine is hosting, Pikana's Unique Pairing Contest! Just to let everyone know, however, I'm choosing to enter this story as a one time thing, so this by no means should worry anyone that I am abandoning my original focus exclusively on stories in the Sonic the Hedgehog catagory. I just had a really good idea for this contest and decided to give it a try. So, please enjoy!

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters or related references from the Smash Bros. games and the games from which these characters themselves come from. I'm just familiar with a lot of them.

The Unlikely Date

_Let's see that puffball dodge this! _Samus thought as she fired a barrage of homing missiles across the Battlefield stage.

Surprising the hunter immensely, however, her target in this short one-on-one brawl, Kirby, ducked below a platform to lose one of her missiles, expertly sidestepped as another one passed right by inches from his face, and then jumped to do a quick roll in midair that successfully got him past the third and final projectile.

_Well, someone's certainly on their game today,_ Samus couldn't help but think as she witnessed how easily it seemed Kirby had dodged her missiles. This match had been going on for a while now with both smashers fighting nearly to a standstill and having just one stock life left each. Samus was glad for the challenge, too, since this seemed to be the first remotely difficult brawl she'd been in all week.

Thinking about her next move before Kirby put her on the defensive, Samus began charging power in her arm-mounted cannon for a giant blast of energy that would be too large for the pink puffball to simply dodge. Looking up while the power was charging, however, Samus caught a glimpse of Kirby on a platform a bit higher than her across the stage hurl an item as moments later a pokeball suddenly opened up at her feet. _Oh sh…!_ Samus remarked as she realized that she was too close and that whatever came out of the pokeball had a good chance of nailing her.

But when the flash of light ended, both Samus and Kirby only witnessed a small Goldeen splashing about helplessly on the brawl stage's floor. Samus smirked to herself inside her visor as she caught the look of disappointment that was clear on Kirby's face. Her arm cannon now at full charge, Samus then made her move by jumping up to Kirby's same altitude and unleashing the giant sphere of energy towards him.

Many other smashers would find a situation like this very difficult, but the pink star warrior and his almost unrivaled aerial skills simply inhaled the air around him and floated up high above the blast, following his quick evasion with a blade of energy he then came slamming back down on the stage with, sending it as a shockwave towards Samus.

The counterattack was easily dodged with just a good hop as Samus finally realized that winning this brawl would take more close quarters combat rather than staying at range. Samus frowned at that. Not that Kirby was more dangerous up close, since by all standards his stubby arms and feet meant that it was actually his weaker point in fighting, but most Smashers avoided a fisticuff battle with Kirby for fear that they would be inhaled by the pink creature and trapped in his stomach. Sure, no one was ever in there long before either they'd flail enough to get out or Kirby copied their ability and spit them out, but being inside another fellow Smasher's stomach was unpleasant enough not to want to experience very often.

Regardless, Samus burst forward quickly in an attempt to close in on Kirby before he could move. Fate had a different plan, however, as a sudden flash engulfed the stage and a rainbow glowing orb appeared just above both of them. _A smash ball?!_ Samus realized as she plainly understood that the rules had changed now. With only one stock life left each, whoever got this smash ball was almost certainly going to end up the winner. Unfortunately, her brief shock almost cost her the chance to get to it first as Samus saw Kirby already in a midair spiral kick heading for the precious item.

As Kirby's attack pounded away at the smash ball, just a second from breaking it and gaining its power, a sudden orange sphere surrounded with lightning shot up from below and stunned him, sending Kirby falling back to the stage as Samus' screw attack finished off the smash ball he had weakened.

Landing expertly on one knee as she now felt the glowing aura around her from the smash ball's power, Samus looked over onto the next platform where Kirby had landed face-first from her unexpected blow. She grinned widely as the ring for her Zero Laser floated out and expanded in front of her as all the power in her suit began flowing into her arm cannon.

Kirby looked up a second after hitting the ground to suddenly be staring down the barrel of Samus' signature weapon while it glowed a brilliant and blinding white from all the energy being collected. His large pupils shrank in realization as Kirby knew there wasn't enough time to even try and dodge this one…

Just as the power was becoming far too much to handle and threatened to overload her arm cannon entirely, the gigantic blast shot out and engulfed the entire area around Kirby, sending the unfortunate target flying off the stage at speeds capable of achieving orbit. Her suit couldn't stand up to its own destructive weapon's force, however, as it began breaking off around her from the strain of resisting the blast's enormous recoil that, according to Newton's Third Law, would otherwise have sent Samus flying off the stage backwards just as fast as Kirby had flown. Samus blinked at the bright light for a second as her helmet gave way and she was left with only her custom laser pistol/whip and her Varia suit that she always wore underneath all her armor.

The announcer then declared her the winner as the stage slowly faded away into the huge and barren brawl room where she and Kirby had loaded the whole level when they first started. Samus then began picking up the pieces of her shattered armor with a grin of satisfaction still on her face. Her suit would take a day at least to put back together again after that finishing move, but having come out the victor in such a tense brawl kept the now scantily clad Samus in a good mood. So much so, in fact, that she seemed to have forgotten about her opponent entirely until a small stubby hand reached down and picked up her helmet for her.

Samus looked up at Kirby in surprise for a second, seeing the big smile on his face as he tried to help out. Not many brawlers would be in a good mood after taking a beating like that and still losing. Then again, Samus had to strain to ever remember a time that Kirby **didn't** seem upbeat, other than when he was hungry for too long, of course. "Thank you, Kirby," Samus politely responded as she took the helmet from the pink creature's hands.

"Puyo!" Kirby simply responded in his strange language that no one else in the Smash Mansion where they all lived could understand. If it were even possible, Samus swore that his smile got even bigger as the small character then started to skip towards the exit happily.

Samus couldn't help herself but to almost giggle. It was a girly impulse, one she herself very rarely indulged in. But, then again, she felt differently with Kirby than a lot of other males in this mansion. First and foremost, of course, was that Kirby seemed completely clueless when it came to female anatomy. Other smashers like Wolf or Falco would have tried to hand her the helmet just to get her to lean over so they could stare at her cleavage from a better angle, but Kirby never once showed any such desires. As a matter of fact, Samus doubted Kirby even understood why other males would want to do things such as that.

Another thing she liked about the innocent pink blob with a never-ending appetite, though, was that Kirby didn't go easy on her in these brawl sessions, either. She'd caught almost every other male at least at one point in a fight forgo the chance for a quick knockout blow on her when they would have done it against anyone else. This problem only doubled when she battled in her Varia suit, too. Many times the male smashers wouldn't attack at all, too transfixed looking at a certain portion of her upper body. Kirby wasn't like that and took every battle seriously while still having fun, win or lose.

Over the past few weeks, Samus had come to respect that, and she wondered if Kirby even knew how much she appreciated his company at times. Maybe he just didn't understand or didn't even know it was going on, but Samus felt she needed to thank him for being the one person that always seemed genuine to her and not jealous like the other brawl females that constantly beat up their boyfriends for staring at Samus when she walked down the halls of the mansion with no armor on. She wanted to thank him privately, but how could she get enough time away from prying eyes to do so?

"Kirby?" Samus called out quickly to the retreating Dreamlander just as he was about to leave into the mansion's hallway from the brawl room's door.

"Puyo?" the small pink creature turned around at the sound of his name and gave a confused stare.

Samus swallowed a small lump in her throat as she prepared to speak again. _Nervous? Why would I suddenly feel nervous?_ the bounty hunter thought before her mouth finally started moving and produced the words she'd wanted. "I would, Umm… I would like to join you for dinner tonight, if that's all right with you," Samus requested, wondering why she suddenly felt so uncomfortable.

Kirby cocked his head at first in even more confusion at the request. She wanted to have dinner with him? Nobody ever ate any meals with him. Kirby was even banned from eating with most of the rest of the Smashers in the dining room due to past behavior, so why suddenly would Samus want to come over to his room and eat with him tonight? It was an odd request for certain, but Kirby eventually smiled at the idea of having a guest. "Puyo!" he eventually shouted out in excitement, clearly accepting Samus' offer as the overjoyed pink creature dashed out into the hallway towards his room, likely in order to 'get ready' for Samus to come later.

Samus herself couldn't help but laugh again at Kirby's overexcitement. Although, something about the way she'd acted earlier when she asked him for permission to show up for dinner still troubled the intergalactic bounty hunter. She'd felt embarrassed… worried… like she was afraid Kirby might say no. But why would she care if he had decided he didn't want company? She was only trying to do this to thank him for being a good friend, wasn't she?

Samus continued these strange thoughts and questions all the way to her own room while carrying the pieces of her destroyed armor with her, not even noticing in her preoccupation the customary stares she got from a couple of the males she ended up passing by on the way.

* * *

_I wonder if anyone is going to notice I'm gone from dinner, _Samus thought to herself as she remembered for the first time that no one knew her plans for the evening with Kirby. Still, she doubted very highly that any of the Smashers would be concerned enough to go looking for her, since skipping group meals was something Samus tended to do on occasion. It could be rather unnerving trying to eat while watching Wario acting so slovenly across the table, all the while still hoping to impress her with his boyish catcalls. It sent a shiver down Samus' spine just to think about.

Of course, a dinner with Kirby might be far from pleasant as well. There was a very good reason the small pink smasher had his meal in his room instead of with all the others. Every time Kirby ever was allowed at the table with the others he would predictably inhale not only his portion of the meal, but also all the rest of the food on the table as well as a great deal of the china and cutlery to boot. Samus began having serious concerns that she would likely go away from her little dinner quite hungry tonight, but there was no backing out now.

The bounty hunter knocked gently on Kirby's door as the latch quickly unlocked from the inside to let her in. "Puyo!" Kirby shouted an excited greeting as Samus causally walked in. With a small grin in reply, she quickly gazed over the small creature and saw a table set up in the middle of the remarkably well-kept room. The table was almost overflowing with food of all sorts, clearly a meal that was an attempt to satisfy Kirby's unending appetite. And yet, in the center, Samus did spot a single lit candle. That's when Samus also first noticed that it was already getting a bit dim inside the room as the evening sun slowly set outside the curtains of Kirby's single window.

"Oh, Kirby, I… didn't expect this to be so formal," Samus muttered in mild shock. Was Kirby trying to make this dinner romantic on purpose? Was he more like the other guys in the mansion than she had first thought? Samus could have been certain Kirby just seemed too young or innocent to be interested in women, but maybe she had only made that mistake because of Kirby's miniature stature and lack of communication skills. Nevertheless, Samus walked up to the nearest chair and sat down, also now noticing that plates and silverware were laid out for both of them at opposite ends of the short table already.

Kirby didn't understand why Samus seemed almost a little frightened all the sudden. Had he done something wrong to upset her already? He didn't usually get company, especially at meal times, so Kirby had made sure to go the extra mile by cleaning his normally disastrously cluttered room, or rather, simply inhaling the whole mess minutes before Samus knocked on the door, and added the lit candle to the food-laden table as an extra touch. After all, girls were supposed to like things like that, or so Kirby had once been told by some of the other males in the mansion before. "Puyo?" Kirby asked as he looked up at Samus inquisitively, wondering if she would tell him what was wrong so he could try and make it better.

Samus realized that Kirby had caught on to her discomfort as she immediately tried to hide it with another friendly grin. "No, I'm fine, Kirby. Just a little… surprised is all," Samus answered while she guessed as to Kirby's original question.

Seeming satisfied by just this simple reassurance, Kirby offered Samus a smile as wide as he was before the cute pink creature quickly hopped up to his own chair across the table. Clearly hungry at the sight of all the food, Kirby no more than sat down before the small pink creature lifted up two large drumsticks of chicken and started to munch.

Half expecting these sorts of table manners, Samus tried her best not to seem disgusted, which proved a bit easier than she'd thought due to the added awkwardness of the situation. The female bounty hunter silently ate her fill of the food on the table, trying her best to ignore Kirby's ravenous feeding at the same time. It wasn't long until, to her surprise, Samus actually managed to eat enough of the food to feel full.

"Puyo?" Kirby surprised her for a moment as he stopped swallowing long enough to ask again if she was all right since Samus had stopped eating.

"Oh, no, everything's fine, Kirby. I'm just full," the bounty hunter replied as she set her silverware down and began to wipe her face with the cloth napkin Kirby or whoever else had helped him set this meal up had provided.

Instantaneously, a strong wind caught Samus off guard as she quickly reached down to grab hold of the table for safety. It seemed as if she was now inside the middle of some sort of powerful tornado as all the food from the table quickly started swirling in midair, all being drawn towards one small point from which the vortex originated. Thankfully, the suction effect didn't last longer than several seconds before all the remaining food was consumed and Kirby let out a surprisingly small and petite burp.

Fussing with her now ruined hair for a moment, Samus just about decided to let the rude puffball have it for such horrible behavior. It was bad enough when he tried swallowing her during a brawl match, but to do so when they were just supposed to be having dinner together casually? Samus finally started to wonder just what kind of insanity had led her to share a meal with Kirby tonight in the first place, knowing full well that he would likely behave like such a glutton.

That's when it hit her, though. Kirby actually **wasn't** behaving like a rude pig tonight. After all, he'd waited for her to finish before devouring the rest of the food on the table in one massive inhale, hadn't he? And since when did Kirby ever care about sharing when it came to food before? The more she considered it, the more Samus actually realized that Kirby was being **overly** well behaved for some reason.

Her scowl gradually turned upwards into a small grin as she looked over at the small puffball in the chair across the now barren table where even the lit candle was now missing. "You waited for me to finish eating first, didn't you?" Samus only half asked as she crossed her arms in front of herself.

A simple nod served as Samus' answer, bringing a full smile to her face as the female chuckled. "I have to say that I'm impressed, Kirby. Sharing food isn't really something you're known to do," Samus told him as she deliberately got up from her seat and walked over to Kirby, wiping his heavily stained face with her napkin she'd somehow managed to keep in her hand during the gale-force inhalation.

The pink creature blushed at the contact, embarrassed to have Samus cleaning his mouth for him. Kirby wasn't used to any kind of touch from a female, which caused the small character to blush a much darker color on his already pink cheeks.

"There, much better," Samus commented as the intergalactic bounty hunter finished wiping the myriad of sauces from Kirby's face and tossed the napkin aside. Something inside her couldn't help but feel amused at Kirby's innocent blushing. The young star warrior was clearly one of the few males in the manor Samus knew wasn't thinking about her breasts as the cause for his discomfort. Kirby's naivety of all sexual matters only made the moment feel better. She could be frank with him, even if Kirby didn't understand anyways, and Samus would never have to wonder if their friendship was secretly based around lustful desire either.

"I guess you're probably wondering why I came to have dinner with you tonight instead of with everyone else, though, right?" Samus asked as she looked down into Kirby's large eyes and found herself admiring the strong spirit she found inside the giant orbs.

"…Puyo?" Kirby simply responded after a while, clearly agreeing that Samus was right about that question but also showing a bit of strangeness in how she seemed to be acting so oddly herself.

"Well, truth is, Kirby…" Samus began to explain as she looked down at herself before meeting eyes with the small pink creature again. "I just get so sick and tired of how the others look at me all the time. All the boys can't keep their eyes off of me, and most of the other women are clearly jealous half the time as well. When I go into a brawl, sometimes the men won't even put up much of a fight. But you never treat me like that," Samus spoke in a grateful tone. "You treat me like you would just any other person. You don't salivate all over yourself when I walk down the halls, and I've never once noticed you holding back on me during a fight. I guess what I just wanted to do tonight would be to say… well, thanks," the female finished her soul-searching speech with another small grin towards the attentive one-person audience.

Kirby clearly understood, too, as the largest smile yet crossed the pink puffball's face. So wide, in fact, that Kirby's eyes also closed cutely in response while he replied with another joyous, "Puyo!"

Samus seized the moment to do something that even she wasn't sure why she did herself and quickly leaned down to plant her lips gently to the top of Kirby's forehead in the spot she'd seen him attach a Franklin Badge to a few times before during a brawl.

Kirby's body immediately shook then stiffened as he realized what Samus had done. Had she really…? Could it have been… a kiss?! Kirby now wobbled on his feet a bit, eventually falling off his chair and onto the floor with a small thud as Samus gasped in slight anxiety.

"Kirby? Kirby, are you okay?" Samus asked in a bit of concern, not expecting her rash and unannounced action to have such a dramatic effect.

A bit dazed, from both the impact on the floor and his unprepared first kiss, Kirby slowly rolled back onto his short feet, wobbling again at first before his brain cleared and he looked up at Samus lucidly once more.

"I… I apologize. I'm not sure what came over me," Samus tried to explain as she easily interpreted the inquisitive look Kirby now gave her. "Tell you what, though. How about we go exercise a bit to make room for some dessert? If everyone's still just getting done with their own suppers, then the brawl room should be open," Samus attempted changing the subject entirely.

Kirby seemed to remain stunned a bit for a moment, until nodding his head enthusiastically and rushing to beat Samus out the bedroom's door. "Puyo, puyo!" he urged her to follow quickly, already seeming to have forgotten about the extremely awkward situation with the promise of another fun brawl and dessert.

It was about all Samus could do not to begin laughing as she promptly followed the easily distracted pink puffball out the door of his own room and down the hall.

* * *

"I just don't-a get it," Mario muttered to the other men in the security surveillance camera control room as they all watched Samus and Kirby's current 'brawl'. It wasn't really much of a fight anymore, though, as Kirby was just sitting comfortably in Samus's lap right now, the female bounty hunter holding his back to her chest gently with her arms wrapped around the small spherical Smasher. The camera had no microphone for audio, but it was clear that the two were simply enjoying each other's company in an innocent conversation. The occasional Shy Guy would propeller down towards the stage now and then with a random food item which Kirby would promptly inhale as Samus smiled at the amusing ability and talent with which Kirby could control the miniature tornado his mouth produced in the process.

"Me neither, Mario. I mean, out of all the guys in this whole mansion, she chooses Kirby?" Link shared the red plumber's confusion.

"Not just that! Man, look at what she's wearing!" Falco Lombardi suddenly chimed in from the spot closest to the monitor. "How many of you guys have seen Samus brawl with anyone without her full suit of armor on recently, huh? And look at how she lets him rest right there in arm's reach of her beautiful…"

"You're drooling on the monitor again, Falco," Wolf O'Donnell interrupted from where he stood in the back of the small room, trying his best to look uninterested even if his presence here was proof enough that he truly was.

"Lucky pink, pint-sized, walking vacuum cleaner," grumbled the Pokémon Trainer from near the others.

"No joke," Link complained in response as Falco apologetically wiped off the screen they were all watching with his shirt sleeve.

"Hey, I don't want to hear it from either you or Mario!" the disgruntled avian's voice retaliated instantly. "At least both of you have girlfriends, not to mention that they live here, too!" Falco pointed out quickly.

Mario looked a bit hurt by the remark as he quickly defended himself. "That may be a-true, but, compared to Samus, Peach is-a… well… much smaller," the plumber coughed once as he realized he'd just admitted to more than he'd probably needed to with that comment.

"They look around the same height to me," the Pokémon Trainer answered, clearly not understanding Mario's implied meaning.

"Mr. Jackrabbit-with-a-plunger isn't talking about how tall they are, idiot," Wolf corrected the slightly more naïve boy as an unsettling smirk came across his face at the private details Mario had absent-mindedly revealed that would make for excellent blackmail and rumors. "And I bet Zelda's no different, eh, Link?" Wolf asked with his disturbing grin.

"Shut up. I can watch Samus if I want to, just like the rest of you perverts," the green-clad swordsman immediately responded, but the timing of his response proved that Mario likely spoke for both those two with his earlier explanation.

"So long as you don't get caught, right?" Wolf added with a short laugh at Link's expense as they all watched to see if Kirby or Samus were ever going to make a move on each other. During this whole time, however, the two seemed perfectly content how they were. Kirby made no attempts at any sort of intimate contact, and Samus seemed perfectly content so long as it remained that way.

"Just not fair…" Falco whined as he watched Samus and Kirby jealously.

There was a sudden knock on the door to the small surveillance room that made all the males inside jump in surprise. "What the…?" the young Pokémon Trainer started to ask before a couple voices were heard from the hallway beyond.

"Why is this door locked? Mariooo, are you in there?" Peach's voice was clearly heard through the only entrance and exit from the room.

"Link? You two had better not be in there with a bunch of other guys watching Samus on those security cameras again!" Zelda's irritated tone just as vividly answered moments later.

Mario and Link suddenly froze in a rigid stance. There was no place to hide as they heard the two women forcing the door open. Beads of sweat rolled across both of their faces as they listened to the locking mechanism in the flimsy door give way, only moments before the women would surely enter and find them…

"You are soooo busted," Falco taunted the two unnecessarily as all the other men in the room smiled broadly at the panicked expressions on Mario and Link's faces.

* * *

He cautiously glanced both up and down the long hallway. He was especially careful to remain inconspicuous as the man made sure nobody saw him heading this direction. Luckily, a confrontation of some sort was drawing away attention at the other end of the hall, leaving him rather confident no one would see him or his ultimate destination, a door towards the end of the hall that led into a personal bedroom like those all the Smashers had.

Paranoid about being seen here and having to explain himself, Ganondorf glanced around yet again before walking up to the door and knocking.

He knew this was dangerous. The self-proclaimed 'King of Evil' visiting a fellow Smasher like her. Still, though, he needed her presence right now. No one else could ever know why or even who his heart secretly desired above all others. It would only get him ridiculed and reveal a weakness that his enemies might exploit. With all this pressure and risk, it was a miracle that Ganondorf even allowed himself to feel this way for her to begin with. His better judgment once more tried to convince him at this moment that he'd be better off alone.

_No!_ Ganon mentally resisted as the dark-clad individual shook his head in his hands. What where these thoughts to begin with? She was the only reason he found his will to survive amongst all these other Smashers. Whenever someone such as Link would best him in combat, which tended to happen all too often in Ganon's mind, or even that one time in which Ganondorf was very scientifically and systematically labeled the 'worst smash character' due to his lack of speed and inability to string combos, only her comfort had kept the inner hurt and rage of his heart from destroying himself.

None of the others would be able to understand, but her touch was always gentle to him. She didn't seem to care about his dark powers or sordid past and ambitions. Her melodies would soothe Ganon's tormented inner soul in ways no other power had ever come close to. He'd even learned to return this unconditional affection, against his very own nature, for only her. One day, when the whole world would bow and call him king, Ganondorf already knew who he would take to be his betrothed queen, as no other could possibly introduce these feelings into his hardened and darkened heart.

But, for now, their relationship must remain a secret. These trips to see her in her room, to receive the emotional support he couldn't let anyone ever know he actually needed, had to remain undiscovered. Otherwise, even Ganondorf shuddered at the thoughts of the ridicule he would be subjected to if news were to spread. _But it is always worth it,_ Ganon reminded himself. _It is all worth the risk to see her again…_

There was a noise created by a voice from the other side of the door at last to invite Ganondorf to enter. He cast one last check over his shoulder before slowly grasping the door handle and gently pushing the door open. Ganon stepped fully inside and closed the door behind him before looking up into the eyes of the only one who he felt truly understood his innermost need for love.

She was standing on her bed, gazing back at him in happiness at his visit. Her large round eyes softened instantly that tyrannical blackened heart, the innocence and love portrayed in them nullifying the vast evil of the man who beheld them, if only for the moment. In excitement, she jumped up as Ganondorf came slowly closer, finally letting out a joyful greeting to the Gerudo king.

"Jiggly!"


End file.
